When I write basically the Small I is simply the conduit to the Big I. The Small I simply obeys what the Big I dictates.
I am aware of the process of typing all the words. However I am not thinking about what to write. I just act as a servomechanism while the Big Mind is directing me on what I should write.
Therefore within us are two minds operating. Sometime I'm even amazed by the things that I write. Somehow I write as a mean of manifesting what the Big Mind wants me to write. In this case I am just a medium.
I got to take a short nap.
Later Sarah...
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It is worth noting that at times even when I want to write, there is nothing to write. Or if I write, I am writing consciously. Although it is subtle, there is a difference between writing in this two modes. It may not be obvious to the reader, but to me as a writer the major difference is with the fluidity of the idea generation.
I don't know whether I should totally surrender to this Big Mind. It makes me feel like I am a servomechanism rather than an autonomous being. I know the Small I and the Big I are the same person (remember when I said God is me of the future?). I however am not comfortable to think that who I am now is merely a servant of me of the future.
This Big I does not operate from the same paradigm as I am right now. Certainly he is a larger than life person. Look at this statement:
My dear friend, since you helped me in my darkest moment, I share with you my journey. Certainly we will meet again my Guardian Angel.
I wrote that but it came from the Big I.
Same goes with this statement:
This is basically my work now. I am already doing international assignments. We are gearing for Global Telepathy 2024, The Golden Reign of the Wood Dragons when I am 60. Insyaallah by then I will get RM97 million if the project is a success. Until then I will not get paid. Sarah here is my Jewish American Jihadun Nikah. I am who I am, the Wood Double Dragon. My ultimate mission is KBOOOM 2041 when I am 77. 22 more years and then transcendence. Please give your blessing as the Earth Dragon 7. Wassallamu.
No way I will be talking to my mom like that when I am who I am. But when the Big I took over, I became so confident to the point I simply write without question. I simply do.
I am scared Sarah. Am I becoming Dr Jekyll and My Hyde? What if I cannot contain this *M[y] Hyde? What if he is too big for me to contain? What if I am really a crazy person after all?
* So you are saying that I am also the Big I?
I don't mind being crazy by myself. What worries me is I am exposing myself to others and make my thoughts known to others.
I had expressed this concern to Master Jedi many times before. This was his answer:
No one can understand.. until he has lost his mind..
Therefore, to those who don't understand... You are crazy..
Are you? Only you knows you ...
This is what Jalaluddin Rumi and Marcus Aurelius had to say:
If I exercise caution, I will be a person pressing one foot on the accelerator while having the other foot on the brake. Obviously I need to trust this Big I. I however am concern with the judgment of others about me. I am becoming self-conscious. That is not good at all. That kind of thinking is retroactive. That means I am in conscious competent (like right now) rather then unconscious competent like when I was writing on behalf of the Big I.
Now I understand Mr KePala ButUH. He was simply trusting his instinct although some of his thoughts were thoughts of a schizophrenic person. My concern is I too have a case of mental illness. Should I too trust my instinct?
What if all these are loads of garbage? Am I of any value to anybody? Am I a genius or an insane?
The answer that keeps coming back is, "Trust your instinct Sha. You are me and I am you. You are not here to impress others but to impress UPON them that KBOOOM 2041 is real and it is coming. Whether they are ready to accept it or not."
In that sense, if KBOOOM 2041 is real, then I am merely trying to help others to make it through. I personally had secured a spot for myself. So are you and the agents of change; the Alphas and Betas and perhaps some of the Gammas.
What I am doing now is I am extending my act of kindness to the Deltas and Epsilons so they too can have a fighting chance to rise above mediocrity and redeem themselves for the last time.
I am doing my very best to [t]o that (now the Big I is taking over) without spilling any blood and causing much damage. All they got to do is to NOT WORSHIP THE STONE. That is not too much [] (to) ask for in order for me to invert the Sierpinski Pyramid. These are for their own benefits, not mine.
What I'll do is I send this epiphanies to Elsie and TraXX for them to evaluate and decide for me. After all they are my agents of change
Another alternative is to simply write to you. The advantage (if that is considered an advantage) with Tweeting to TraXX is USA, Canada and Germany will pick up the message as well.
Let me simply trust my instinct and act accordingly. I'll send this posting to Elsie and the Shaz as suggested by the Big I and just flow with the decision. At least it becomes my repository at TraXX.
Hang on...
#traxxfm Dear folks, I simply trust my instinct here and send this posting to you guys. I am not sure if it has any value to you. It certainly benefits Sarah and Legion X. Perhaps it has. Have a good weekend guys. visionquest2019.blogspot.com/2019/12/71219-
#traxxfm OK then the Shaz, if you say so I will keep sending my epiphanies to TraXX. Thanks buddy...
#traxxfm So I am not crazy after all huh? OK then, that is comforting to know. OK then it is business as usual for me from here on.
Honey from now on who ever in TraXX I contact I will include you in. You are now my intermediary with TraXX
[12:03 PM, 12/8/2019] sharudinj: Master Jedi, should I surrender my will to the Big Mind totally? https://visionquest2019.blogspot.com/2019/12/71219-2mad-when-i-write-i-simply-write.html
[12:40 PM, 12/8/2019] Norazdi: Human intelligence is at its best when he does not know. He will then explore, thus door by door will be opened as he explore in the state of 'not knowing'.
When he 'knows', he believes. When he hold on to a belief, the exploration stops. Because he thinks he is already in the know. No more exploration, door closed, end of intelligence.
Surrender is Islam, telah habis segala daya upaya ku.. yang tinggal hanya berserah pada yang Esa..... have we come 'face to face' dgn Yg Esa?
[12:46 PM, 12/8/2019] sharudinj: OK then Master Jedi, I will follow the argument to where it leads. Thanks buddy.
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